Mom I miss you.

Missing the one person I can have a long conversation with at random. My beat friend!!!who wasn’t perfect but she always believe. Believe that God answer prayers. Believe that her kids deserve the best even when it seems impossible. Believe that her hard work is worth it even when she was working harder than the amount she was being paid.

Despite her workaholic, compulsive, and overwork behavior. You had a fight. A fight that was frustrating to many. A fight that many didn’t know you had.

Mom I miss you. I miss us talking on the phone. Watching you talk about the Bible. Watching you go above and beyond to help someone even when you were in the same position.

I miss that I cannot hold my brother or get to see you in your wedding gown. I miss you. Your pain wasnt evident but we knew you needed help. From sleeping on hard concrete to not being able meet our basic needs yet you continue to pray for us so that we can be better.

I dont know all the things you’ve been through but I know I miss you. I hate that you won’t be able to spend time with your grandkids or give us advice on how to parent.

I hate that we cannot come over to each others house and have a laugh while my brother and his nephew plays together. Little brother you would have been six years old. It is probably better where you are because we dont know what life would be if you were here right now. .

What happened is unfair but I miss you. I miss your kicks whenever you feel my gentle touch we were happy to have you a little brother and you will always be remembered.

We may never get to see you cry. Smile. Talk. Walk. But we will always love you. You would have been a spoiled baby brother. We love you. You would have bring so much joy. a little bit of pain. maybe some struggles. fights to see who got next to hold you. You would have been an amazing uncle.

You would have realise your family is a bit crazy lol you would like the food, cakes, and the music. You would have been an amazing little brother at my wedding. We love you.

Mom I miss you…

I was looking forward to you being at my graduation. Wedding. New home. At the hospital to hold your grandkids. a home to send my kids to when I needed a few days to our self. Mom I miss you…

I miss that i cant do those things with you. The only conversation that I have of us is the night before i arrived to New York letting you know how excited i am to see you.



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